Search for authenticity

I will continue over the next few days with a few more travel stories, but I decided to take a time-out from that and post on something that I have been thinking about more lately. I have been asking myself more as of late, "what constitutes an authentic life?" If I am honest with myself, I must admit that the decision to go to Finland is about more than just an opportunity to coach football overseas and live out a sort of adventure. The pace of my life here in the states, especially over the last 6 years could best be described as a whirlwind. My roller coaster lifestyle has left very little time for reflection. I began to feel very empty, drained, and my existence was defined by a continual "list of obligations, pressures, and things to do." I knew things were out of balance and my family and I needed a change. Working 70+ hours a week and not eating right, sleeping much, or getting enough quality time to spend with my family left me feeling that a change had to be made. I had lost touch with myself and that included my dreams, passions, and energy for life. The culture we live in justifies all of this behavior because working and staying busy is how we too often define ourselves or measure our self worth. Where was the joy in my life? I have to admit most of the people I was around were miserable too. I was allowing myself to live in a box that I had created and much of what I was experiencing daily was self-imposed. Nobody was holding a gun to my head and demanding that I carry on living this way. The reason I continued down this dark road is that I got comfortable even when living in dysfunction. My desire to be a people pleaser probably also contributed to the mess I was in. I was always taking on more at work, and then I was the one who would suffer for it. The decision to change had to come from within. I realized that I needed to awaken and begin to swim upstream against the current. My goals were actually quite simple. I wanted to create more time for personal reflection, live a more simple life, get outside and explore nature and all that God has created, tap into my passions and creativity, and reconnect with my family in a deeper and more lasting way. Many of these ideals are what Henry David Thoreau was searching for when he went to live at Walden Pond in 1845. Thoreau felt that outside forces dull and subjugate the inner man, especially materialism and constant labor. He emphasized the importance of surmounting the obstacles that materialistic society places in the path of the individual. When he made his journey to Walden, he sought self-improvement and a desire to cultivate his intellectual and spiritual needs. The world we live in and the busyness we are all a part of can really choke and suppress what we might be. Essentially, I am talking about living more in the present and leading a more deliberate life. I definitely don't claim to have life figured out by any means, but I have noticed a difference since I decided to put the brakes on. I feel very grateful for all the people in my life including my family and friends. I am so proud of my children and Estalita and sometimes I just can't contain all the love I feel for them. I'm sure struggles are still going to come our way like they always have, but I'm hopeful that our new path will bring about greater insight, inspiration, and appreciation of this journey that we are on. Yes, I have chosen to be a coach in Finland, but even more importantly, I am on a quest to live a more deliberate and authentic life. I just want to encourage you today to chase after the life that you feel called to live. The culture you live in will always tell you that you need more "things" to make you happy. Here is a short story that illustrates the contentment and fulfillment that can be attained through living a simple life. The story also illustrates how others/society will try and influence us to pursue principles or ideals that have less meaning and significance.

How Much is Enough?

The American investment banker was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fishermen docked. Inside the small boat were several large fin tuna. The American complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took to catch them.

The Mexican replied only a little while.

The American then asked why didn’t he stay out longer and catch more fish?

The Mexican said he had enough to support his family’s immediate needs.

The American then asked, “ but what do you do with the rest of your time?”

The Mexican fishermen said, “ I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, take siesta with my wife, Maria, stroll into the village each evening where I sip wine and play guitar with my amigos, I have a full and busy life.”

The American scoffed, “ I am a Harvard MBA and could help you. You should spend more time fishing and with the proceeds, buy a bigger boat, and with the proceeds from the bigger boat you could buy several boats. Eventually, you would have a fleet of fishing boats. Instead of selling your catch to a middleman you would sell directly to the processor, eventually opening your own cannery. You would control the product, processing, and distribution. You would need to leave this small coastal fishing village and move to Mexico City, then LA and eventually NYC where you will run your expanding enterprise.

The Mexican fisherman asked, “ But how long will all this take?’

To which the American replied, “15-20 years.”

“But what then?”

The American laughed and said that’s the best part. “When the time is right you would announce an IPO and sell your company stock to the public and become very rich, you would make millions.”

“Millions?” asked the fisherman, “Then what?”

The American said, “ Then you would retire. Move to a small coastal fishing village where you would sleep late, fish a little, play with your kids, take siesta with your wife, stroll to the village in the evening, sip wine and play your guitar with your amigos!”

Author Unknown

Lights out.